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Clean Jokes

Viruses

The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep counting and re-counting. The Clinton Virus - Gives you a 7-inch Hard Drive with NO memory. The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy. The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your computer, and then e-mails everyone about what it did. The Ronald Reagan Virus - Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored. The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes. The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 300 Mb hard drive shrinks to 100Mb, and then slowly expands to re-stabilize around 200 Mb. The Jack Kevorkian Virus - Deletes all old files. The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted. The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care. The Joey Buttafuoco Virus - Only attacks minor files. The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back. Our Favorite - The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy . and then discards it through Windows